The Imperative of Keeping Virginity Until Marriage & The Dire Consequences of Not Doing So

"Saint Euphrasia was stronger and wiser than the brutal warrior and ended up receiving the heavenly crown, eternal life. Many, on the other hand, are deprived of it for the sake of temporary pleasure, and then regret it for a long time, but in vain. . ."

Editor's Note: This article was generated by machine translation, so our staff cautions the reader about possible inaccuracies that may have resulted from this. However, it was deemed worthwhile to still publish such a piece because of the intrinsic value of the message - which remains evident even in its translated form. 

Today's pastors say that many people these days are ready to agree to and accept any church law, as long as it does not disturb the sphere of their intimate relationships. It is easy for people to part with their virginity, in a hurry to assuage themselves with the opinion that "everyone lives like that now".

In 303 A.D. a maiden of unprecedented beauty, Euphrasia, was brought to the governor Maximian in Nicomedia. The ruthless tormentor commanded her to renounce Christ and worship idols, or she would be defiled. And so a rude warrior with a naked sword stood beside Euphrasia, lusting after carnal pleasures. The Lady of God turned with fervent prayer to the Savior, firmly believing that the Lord would not be ashamed.

And suddenly a heavenly admonition appeared in the heart of the saint, like a ray of light. Euphrasia said: "Brave warrior, you have often been in battle. Would you like me to find you such a wondrous flower that preserves you from all enemy crippling?" The Legionnaire's eyes lit up: "Find me such a flower: I want to have it with me always." The saint continued: "This flower can have power only when given by a maiden, not by a woman." The soldier, wanting to get hold of the miraculous talisman, followed Euphrasia into the garden.

There she walks through the beautiful garden and picks flowers - all like an angel, in white, with her hair loose. She is looking for the flower of immortality. Finally the girl points to several monotonous flowers, "These are the flowers of immortality," she gently plucks them and adds: "In order that you may see for yourself their miraculous effects, put them around my neck and strike them hard with your sword." Crossing herself, Saint Euphrasia bared her young neck and humbly bowed her head. And the warrior, putting the flowers to her neck, struck hard with his sword.

Quietly, as if continuing a reverent, humble prayer, the decapitated body fell on the grass. The warrior stared in amazement at the deed of the young Christian girl. For the sake of virginity, the imperishable gift of chastity, Saint Euphrasia sacrificed her life. And her soul... Having inherited a heavenly crown, she helps those on earth who try to keep their virginity.

To many people this example would seem strange. Was it worth losing life itself to keep her virginity? So at least she would have lived, or else nothing at all. Let's think about it: it is common for people to lose their virginity when there is no question of a threat to their lives. Saint Euphrasia showed us: to keep virginity means to keep an exceptional divine gift, to keep the best that is in us. It is true that virginity is one of man's most precious treasures.

And it is a treasure that God gives to all of us freely. He gives it only once. This treasure is as priceless as holiness, as purity and chastity of heart. It is no coincidence that in every young man and girl there is a deep sense of the sanctity of his virginity. The defenseless girl, Saint Euphrasia, was stronger and wiser than the brutal warrior and ended up receiving the heavenly crown, eternal life. Many, on the other hand, are deprived of it for the sake of temporary sweetness, and then regret it for a long time, but in vain.

Young people today have two forms of stumbling blocks in this regard, and two perspectives on premarital relations accordingly.

First, some people perceive premarital relationships as a natural way to communicate with another person at a certain stage of acquaintance. And marriage in this case is not even assumed. Let's say, the guy liked the ice cream - bought and ate, attracted the attention of the advertising film - went and watched, interested in a pretty girl - met and slept together. It's all kind of natural: eat, watch, get intimate.

A few years ago, a certain girl wanted very much to marry a young man she knew. But he wasn't willing, and after one party she was able to seduce him. This was followed by a pregnancy, and now she began to blackmail her victim: "We have a child. If you don't marry me, I'll have an abortion."

That is how one vice leads to another: from fornication to murder, it turns out, is one step. I don't know how this story ended, except that the young man sought a solution to his problem in church. Is it even worth it to create such problems for oneself? By the way, the Holy Fathers have very wise recommendations that will help in time to protect themselves from an unnecessary tragedy. Venerable Nicodemus of Holy Mountain said: "remember, you are gunpowder, do not touch fire, that is, do not allow yourself risky intimacy with a person of the opposite sex. Do not go where you will lose your treasure, avoid situations in which tragedy will happen."

Sometimes, too, a girl, having allowed intimacy, loses her independence, fears that she will now be abandoned, and begins to run after the guy herself. But tenderness now disappears in mutual relations. The lover then treats her unceremoniously: he knows that he has already captured her. And as the mosquito, drunk on blood, leaves heavily and slowly, indifferent to everything, so goes the lover, satisfied to the full extent of his passion.

"Here young maidens blossom
For the whim of the villain's insensitive whim"

- A. S. Pushkin.

Too many girls know from bitter experience: barely a guy got "what he wanted" as he became rude and impudent, reverence has disappeared from friendship. Lermontov was well aware of the psychology of this temptation when he put these words into the mouth of the proud Pechorin: "There is an immense pleasure in possessing a young, barely blossoming soul! It is like a flower, which best aroma evaporates towards the first ray of sunshine; it must be picked at this minute, and after inhaling it to the full, throw it on the road: see if someone picks it up!

There's a very good rule of life: don't appropriate someone else's property. If you accidentally entered the canteen, saw the table set, it does not mean that you have to wait until the moment when you liked the dish you can quickly eat. It wasn't made for you, so don't steal it from someone else. There is God's will about each of us. God, in His wise Providence, chooses beforehand the partner for our life, the one with whom we will be united in flesh in the sacrament of Marriage. By giving oneself to someone before the Marriage, one is impudently intruding into this Providence, as if one is saying to the Heavenly Father: "I don't need your gifts, I can take care of myself." He is like a capricious child who exchanges the wholesome fruit served in due time for a pie made of sand he wants to mold right now.

There are some rather true observations of life. The self-loving one is in a hurry to satisfy himself, his low, bodily senses. He longs to satiate his criminal passion with the person he likes, but as soon as he is satiated, he cools down in an instant and turns away from the imaginary beloved. The desire to possess another person, to satiate himself with his beauty and virginity shows not love, but secret pride. Let such a hero appear handsome, strong, courageous. But it is very likely that this is not the hero of your novel.

Believe that true love is alien to impertinence. Carnal affection lingers on the earth like the smoke of Cain's sacrifice, while pure friendship ascends to heaven like fragrant incense. As you hold the fragile vessel of precious peace carefully in your hands, so preserve the purity of love. As a mother embraces her newborn baby, so embrace the feelings of first love. Do not give your purity, your virginity, do not rush your first night.

Let you delay, but you will gain infinitely more. Virginity is like a child's clean face, fornication is like a scar on a beautiful face. Like the squeak of iron on glass, so the prodigal thoughts resonate in the soul. And like the catastrophe of a city suffering a natural disaster, so the molestation of a virgin is the catastrophe of your personal destiny. The loss of innocence is reflected even in the face, the beauty of such a person loses its freshness, it bears the stamp of depravity.

One priest went into a library where a girl was taking an order, radiant with freshness, purity and innocence. When he came in the next day, he was astonished to find her face so gray, and her soul seemed to be burdened, as if someone had ruined it. About this the priest later bitterly said: "Who dared to ruin this temple?" This is always punished by reproaches of conscience, and at the very first time of premarital contact the soul still feels something wrong - some stain on the soul, something criminal - such a person stepped over the forbidden line, or rather, he committed a deep defilement over his soul.

Then, if a person continues this way of life, the voice of conscience fades away, and he sinks into a kind of intoxication, a revelation of this way of life. It is difficult to give it up, because the barrier of conscience is overcome, and passion revels the depths of your being with bright, though temporary, flashes, before which all other pleasures pale into insignificance. But as time passes, feelings become bored, and carnal pleasures you are no longer satiated, inside there is an emptiness. The loss of virginity is ultimately disappointing and is like the shards of a once beautiful and precious vessel broken.

Man who had premarital sex, entering into marriage, often no longer able to internally accept God's commandment: the two will be one flesh (Matthew 19: 5), because how many times he was already united with women and now unwittingly perceives marriage as another option, maybe not the last, as a touch of things to which he had long been accustomed. The sacredness of intimate relationships disappears, and they are perceived simply as pleasure, not as a sacrament and miracle of procreation. Moreover, man begins to compare with whom he was better, that is, everything is measured not by spiritual or psychic qualities, but by the most primitive sensual experience.

There is a law in the world: those who preserve purity are under the cover of God. When man deprives himself of purity, he also loses divine help. King David was under the protection of the Most High until he fell into adultery. After he lost his purity, many troubles befell him immediately. What troubles haunt fornicators these days is known to everyone.

Nowadays it is sometimes said that nowadays almost everyone has experience of intimate life before marriage, and therefore talk about virginity is a manifestation of the ancient, medieval conceptions. So it could be stated that the 7th commandment, "Thou shalt not commit adultery," is infinitely outdated. In fact, such a statement contains a profound lie, and those who utter it are judging the people around them by themselves.

First of all, let us note that fornication, not only in our time, but in all ages without exception, has been man's favorite temptation.

The leaders of the people from whom our jurisprudence is derived, that is, the people of Rome, the emperors were characterized by unprecedented promiscuity. Prince Vladimir, before his conversion to Christianity, was not stingy with wives and concubines. One Russian empress summoned the guards in the evenings to choose a soldier for one night.

And even in the hagiography of the elder Silouan it is told that in his youth, when he had not yet even contemplated his monastic future, he met a beautiful girl, and one evening "the usual" happened to them. So our time in history is no exception. However, it is the unmistakability of the Gospel, the novelty of Christianity-this novelty does not cease with the passage of time-that it is in the midst of such temptations and frequent falls that the virtue of virginity shines with a special light. Whoever keeps purity gains a special closeness to God, and God helps such a person.

And let us add that to this day there are pure souls who have preserved themselves in chastity. Honestly, our conscience prompts us to keep virginity.

All prodigal sins are based on a lack of true love for one's neighbor. This is a very important point. He who loves sees the loved one as the highest value, not as a means to the satisfaction of his passions. True love reverences the chastity of the beloved; it will not allow bodily intimacy before marriage, and in marriage it will maintain mutual fidelity.

There is something else worth noting here. As we said, there is another point of view. Someone, for example, will say the following: "Okay. You shouldn't give yourself to just anyone, of course. But if we've been friends for a long time and even decided to get married, why is intimate communication unacceptable before the wedding? Does it matter when it comes, since our fate is already sealed?"

It's like a more noble kind of fornication: we're getting married soon anyway, and what difference does it make whether we get intimate now or two months from now?

Imagine that on the day of your birthday a table is set especially for you, and you immediately rush to devour the appetizing dishes-it doesn't matter whether it's now or a little later, when everyone is assembled, when you have everyone's attention. Yes, the dinner is prepared for you, but your behavior is ruining the celebration and stealing happiness from yourself. So the bride and groom, who allow intimacy, come to the marriage as a dinner already ruined - there is no freshness and joy in the new life.

And let's think about what it means: does it matter when? Does it matter when to have children: upon marriage or somewhat earlier? Does it matter when to raise a child: having a reliable spouse or when he did not appear (or disappeared before the wedding)? Does it matter when to declare their love: when they see each other or after the test of time?

Source: (Russian)

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